16 | How to Create a Simple Bedtime Routine to Connect with God (That You'll Love Too)

Hey friends, welcome to Intentional Motherhood, peaceful parenting skills for deeper connection and living your purpose. I'm your host, Kelsey Redd, your guide to thriving as a mom who's crafting your own dream life while raising amazing kids. And today, we're gonna talk about something that every mom knows all too well, bedtime routines. Oh, bedtime is, how do we say, a nightmare sometimes? And also, a golden opportunity to deepen your connection with your kids, to nourish their spirits, and even to help them process their day.

I promised you in a previous episode that I was going to tell you all about my bedtime routine, and especially my favorite part, which was inspired by Justin Early Whitmull's book Habits of the Household, and it's his body blessing. And I love this part of bedtime. And this is the part I really am excited to tell you about. Also, I have to tell you that Justin Early Whitmull just started his own podcast and guess what it's called? Intentional Fatherhood.

So please go over and visit that podcast, share it with your husband so you guys can be on the same page as you're learning how to be intentional parents. I'm so excited about this. So let's talk about bedtime, especially bedtime with young kids. It can sometimes feel like you want to pull your hair out. I am amazed at how bedtime has the ability to bring out the absolute worst in all humans.

At least I know I have had some of my worst parenting moments during the bedtime routine. There's always someone who suddenly is starving for dinner now that it's bedtime, although they refuse to eat dinner two hours earlier. Nobody's ever tired. We finally learned the trick of having to actually plug our kids' noses to get them to open their mouth so we can brush their teeth. I mean, there's a parenting hack for you if you've ever needed one.

So mamas, I see you. I've been there. I've got four kids under six, twins included. It is chaotic. These moments test our patience, but they're also an opportunity to show up intentionally and they can be so beautiful.

And also let me be clear that the bedtime routine I'm going to share with you is my ideal bedtime routine. It's the routine that it's like the gold medal of routines. And oftentimes it is not the bedtime routine that actually happens, but it's what we're striving for, right? It's that bedtime that happens every once in a while, and you leave the bedroom and you think that was it. That is a parenting win.

That was how I wanted to show up. I'm also gonna tell you that it's a times and seasons kind of thing because right now we're in a season, like literally a season, it's called summer, where we have thrown almost all bedtime routines out the window because it's not getting dark till after nine, we're playing, we're doing things a little differently with very loose schedules and very loose routines. There's something special about that in and of itself. So we do the best we can. But I wanted to share the bedtime routine that I love with you so that when you're in those high vibe moments and you're ready to bring it, bring it 100%, that you'll have some ideas for how to do that.

So bedtime can be a beautiful window of time to connect, to teach, to communicate, to teach kids even gospel principles. So how do we turn what can be a very chaotic time into something a little more soulful? So let me break it down. First of all, we keep our bedtime routine as simple as possible. We only have the very least amount of steps that we have to to get into bed.

The first is we gather in the kid's bedroom and we all get together for a family prayer. This is a moment where we get to, first of all, teach what prayer should look like. We talk about reverent positions and how to show God respect and honor in our prayer by not rolling around and wrestling, not playing, not flailing around, but trying to actually be in a seated or kneeling position with our eyes closed and our hands folded and showing respect. We tell our kids to show respect for God and for the person saying the prayer as we say this family prayer. And I love the family prayer opportunity to ask kids to say, Okay, what are you guys thankful for?

What should we say that we're grateful for in this prayer? And we can maybe all, maybe a few of us share something we're grateful for. And then I can also ask them, is there anything that anyone needs help with? Is there anything that you guys are worried about? And we can communicate those together and we can explain that the person saying the prayer gets to speak for everyone else in the family and ask for those things that we need.

And that's a really good way. Our kids are young, but I think as they get older, it's gonna be a really cool way to help our family stay in touch with the worries and challenges that we're all facing so that they can be aware. Oftentimes, when mom and dad say the prayer, it sounds a lot like, please help mom and dad to be patient and to not yell during bedtime. That's a very common prayer at nighttime for us. So after family prayer, we have brush teeth, go potty, get in bed.

That's pretty much it. It's like I said, as minimal as we can possibly be. But it's after the kids are getting in bed, and we come to say our good nights, that is where the real magic happens. Because this is the opportunity that we have to speak individually to each of our kids. And this is the part where, again, I guide them through their own prayer, I encourage them to say prayer by themselves now.

And this is where I get to ask them individually. And of course, my husband is doing this with another child. Or we're doing an abbreviated version of this because someone is with the baby, or because someone is out in the evening and there's only one parent. So again, it looks different. But let's just go with the ideal, right?

So ideally, this is where I get to lay with each of my kids, or at least a couple of them, and ask them, Okay, when you say your prayers today, what are you going to say that you're really grateful for? What went well in your day today that you want to say thank you to God for? And they'll maybe tell us a few things. I say, Is there anything you're worried about? Is there anything you need help with?

Is there anything that scared you today? Or is there anything that you maybe need to say sorry for in your prayer tonight? And we can talk through those things a little bit. And then I usually ask them, Do you want to say the prayer or do you want me to say your prayer? And right now, of my kids young age, they usually want me to pray.

And I love it because it's an opportunity for me to model to them what I want their prayers to sound like as they get older, to model the conversations that I hope that they have with God as they grow up and are off on their own. So asking those questions in and of themselves is a great way to kind of find out what's going on in my kids' hearts and minds. Sometimes I'll just say, What kinds of things are you excited about? Or Is there anything that is worrying you right now? Is there anything that you're feeling icky about?

And those might just be conversation starters that we can talk about as we're getting ready for that prayer. But typically, after I say the prayer, I always say, Now I'm going to give you your body blessing. And again, credit where credit is due. This is straight out of Habits of the Household by Justin Early Whitmull. And I have changed the words a little bit.

But in that book, he gives his exact script that he says in his Body Blessings. And like I said, I've changed it a little bit, but it essentially follows the script of I touch their feet, and I bless their feet. I bless their feet that they will be able to confidently walk where they need to go. And then I touch their legs and I bless their legs. And then I touch a belly and I say, bless her belly, that it will be full of good nutrition.

And I touch her back or his back. And I say, bless his back that he'll be able to bear the burdens that he faces. And I touch his arms and hands. And I say bless his arms and hands to be anxiously engaged in good works and kind deeds. I bless their necks to turn towards those in need.

I bless their ears to hear the Word of God and to hear the Word of their parents. The fun part about these blessings is I slip in all the things that I want to teach them that they don't want me to lecture them on. I slip it into their body blessing. I bless their eyes to see beauty in the world around them. I bless their mouths, and this is one of my favorites, to always say kind words, to always use kind tones, and to never scream at mom, and to never scream at their sister.

Sometimes I leave that part out, but sometimes on a bad day, I remind them in their body blessing to never scream at mom. And I bless their minds to be full of the knowledge and wisdom of Jesus. And above all, I touch their heart and I say, I bless your heart to be full of love for God, for others and for yourself. And that's the end of the prayer. And that is my favorite part of our bedtime routine.

And that one, despite what else is going try to squeeze in no matter what, no matter how exhausted or frustrated I am. And that helps me remember how sacred my sweet little babies are, and what I want for their life, and what I want to teach them, and what I want them to experience day to day. And I know from doing it day after day, week after week now for months and probably years, that it's sinking into them too, that they're starting to understand how God can show up in their life because I've blessed God to be a part of every part of their body and every part of their day and all the things they do. So there you have it. That is my favorite bedtime routine, my favorite part of the bedtime routine.

And I hope that it helps you and gives you some ideas of things you can incorporate into your bedtime routine to make bedtime a little more intentional in your home. Share your favorite rituals with me on Instagram creating. Intentional. Mothers. If you found this episode helpful, subscribe to the show and leave a review so even more moms out there can find this space and connect with us so that we can build our community of uplifting moms.

I'll see you next time on Intentional Motherhood.